Who is the author of this madness?

Devout heathen, turned on by the intellectually curious, fluent in snark, psychedelic vacationist, mouth maid wielding scalers of unimaginable calculus obliterating power, hopelessly addicted to my subwoofer, pleasantly surprised pessimist, body perforating enthusiast, social porcupine, stick-shift loyalist, living room terpsichorean, reigning cherry stem tying champion, my Southern accent is my secret weapon, and my blood consists of red-pill man-boy tears and second-wave feminist angst.

If you can't find happiness, no matter how hard you try—baby steps: take a shower, eat a meal, take your pills, and let your worried friends know you're still alive. I'm with you. I see you. Keep going. It gets better. Be kind, y'all

...But if you're a bottom-feeding, bullying, maladapted, shit-stirring, phony, easily offended, self-absorbed, lying, scheming, twatwaffle cunt intent on ruining my uncharacteristically chipper mood, then you've awakened the beast. Welcome to Fuckdome. Let's rumble.

This is a place for me to put my mind. Here, I will feature my subversive prose and any arts-and-crafts I feel are good enough to share with the world. Maybe something I write or create will speak to you and we can share a giggle or a good cry. My only goal for this blog is to connect my tiny corner of the internet with yours. Enjoy!

~I Killed Earl